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Archive for July, 2012

This totally should have been 2 posts but I am so horrible at getting things posted lately I thought it best to go ahead with one ginormous one.

So this weekend is Brookings SD big 41st year Art in the Park. Anyone in the neighborhood swing by. It is supposed to be a beautiful weekend. I am where I always am except perhaps 20 feet to the North. Something about construction. I don’t know.

So in preparation I washed the van of the past 2 weeks gravel road dust and bird poo. (You can tell the mulberries are ripe.)

Being the person that I am of course I have no car shampoo? Car soap? Whatever the heck it is you use to wash cars. (My van is too big to fit in a car wash … plus I live about 30 miles from the nearest one.)

So what’s a girl to do. I usually use dish soap but I heard that has a harsh effect of the shiny coating. Something milder than dish soap eh? Bodywash.

Yup. So now my van smells of Caress’s Sheer Twilight. Which is a lovely seductive scent which totally does not at all belong on a big ass van. So passerbys will be entranced, aroused and finally confused.

Your welcome world.

Kicking and Screaming
Most folks are surprised that until pretty much last week I did not accept credit cards at art fairs. There were several reasons for this.

* It was cost prohibitive. Meaning between the equipment fees, monthly fees, swipe fees and finally a transaction fee I would have to raise my prices to make up for the lost income. So would you want to pay more in order to use your card? Yeah I thought not.

* I didn’t actually lose many sales. Everyone tells me my sales will go up. Fact is I don’t think so. Or at least it will be a marginal increase. Most have committed to buying an item and have it in their hot little hands when they approach me. My last event I lost exactly $20 in sales from not accepting cards. I’d say around 50% ask but when they find out I don’t they whip out cash or the checkbook.

* One less thing to deal with. In the end I am lazy about somethings and technology is one of them. My life is complicated enough without having to charge your $3 purchase.

So why did I finally come kicking and screaming into the merchant world?

Square.com

Okay so I don’t usually promote things like this and as yet I haven’t used it in a real world application other than to charge myself a $1 as a practice go. But I have talked to many many artists who have used it and love it.

* No equipment fees. No monthly fees. No swipe fees.
And just 2.75% of the transaction is taken from each sale.

* Easy to set up an account.
I set up an account in less than 15 minutes and the swipe reader arrived 4 business days later.

* It’s easy easy easy to use. You don’t need a degree in computer science to work it. In fact it is pretty much just three steps. Log into your account. Plug your swipe reader into your smart phone, laptop tablet etc. Swipe card. Okay there is a couple more steps. You can set up for it to add sales tax automatically. The customer signs for it and you can email or text them a receipt. But that’s it. Then a couple of days later the money shows up in your bank account or paypal or whatever.

Sweet.

At any rate I’ll let you know how it goes and if I have any problems.

So all of you wanting an original Mona Majororwicz but wished to pay with credit card … Bring it on!

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Total Man Candy

Reader Alert!
This post is completely useless ramblings of a middle aged mind who has gone to see a movie that is totally inappropriate for me since it’s filled filled with sweaty, young, beastly men gyrating there way across the stage.

Nothing of any really worth or merit is to be found in this post. You are hereby advised to skip it and wait for the next one.

Just sayin’

It’s an arts film, really.
So today being Sunday I had a couple of options. Spend the day at the gallery and work on my latest painting which requires a whole boat load worth of drawing (which I’ll talk about as soon as I have something to show)

OR…..

go to a movie with a dear friend.

Guess which one I chose.

I’m a bit of a movie freak. I like a wide variety of stuff. Like last week I went to see Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter (you guessed it a historical drama – and of which I am currently reading the book.) and also Brave from Pixar. Good wholesome entertainment there.

But today … today we went to see …

Magic Mike.

If you’re not familiar it is about an aging (and by aging I mean going on 30) male stripper (played by Channing Tatum … YUM) and his quest to be something more. Magic Mike wants to sell his artistic furniture creations …. so technically this is a movie about the arts. I know right? How perfect for me.

Was it the next Schindler’s List? No. But it totally delivered what it promised.

Don’t call it a chick flick .. it’s a granny flick.
I say this only because the audience in this theater was my age or older.

Huh?

I wonder if Matthew McConaughey knew that this was the age group he’d be playing to when he signed up?

Truthfully Matthew is seriously cut and a fine example of manliness. But him trying to compete with a bunch of studly muffins half his age was kinda gruesome to watch.

My only other complaint is the ending was like walking into a closed door. Abrupt and a little painful, filled with a side of confusion. That being said, no one goes to see this flick for the story.

Actual Thoughts I Had During The Movie
Wow, hot naked guy right after the opening credits!
Kinda shocking but … awesome!
BRING … IT … ON!!!!

Is that what I think it is filling up the screen?
On this screen it’s like 30 feet long and growing.
Um … wow.
Why is it blurry?
Damn, I wonder if I need bifocals.

Okay that can’t be his real size.
That’s … a little scary.
I wonder what sex would be like?
Okay perhaps I should be ashamed of that thought.
That thought should make someone my age blush. Right?
(after a moment of self reflection) Nope I guess not.

Oooh fire fighters.
Oooh cowboys
Oooh Tarzan.
Oooh cheekless pants.

Matthew you are kinda creepy.
Please quit playing the guitar.
Really? … You really thought you needed a solo song?
I wonder if I set up a chant for more Magic Mike if others would join it.
Oh right this is a movie theater, not a strip club.
Bummer.

To make up for my movie choice I listened to NPR all the way home because that’s what is appropriate for grown up woman of granny age. And tonight I’ll work on my drawings so I can sit back and ponder the glory that is Channing Tatum without the smallest sense of guilt. 🙂

Oh Lord, I wonder if that makes me a cougar?

Okay maybe just a little guilt.

One Last Thing

As I said I went to this movie with a dear friend. We’ve known each other all our lives. Honestly She’s been my bestie for longer than I can remember back. My mom loves to tell the story of my first day at Kindergarten. Mom asked me if I made any friends and I said “Uh huh. A rabbit and a girl named Jolene. She’s gonna have a horse too.”

There’s something kinda wonderful about going to something like this with someone who knows all about me. No embarrassment. No judgement. Instead we just gave each other shocked wide-eyed expressions at what we were watching, followed by girlish giggling. I highly recommend the girlish giggling.

Okay next post will actually have something to do with art.
I pinkie swear.

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Kirkendahl is the poster child of my horse portrait page now featured on the Wild Faces Gallery website. I gotta proudly declare that I built it from the code up. And as a woman of 40 plus some years that’s sayin’ something. Now I realize a 6 year old could probably have done a nicer job of it but… well … if you know of one let me know. I just got an android smart phone that they can help me with too.

Okay so this page has actually been up for quite awhile now but I thought it was high time I started pimpin’ it.

So heck so if you’re bored … or better yet, needin’ your pony painted check it out.

Ah now all I’ve gotta do is sit back and wait for the orders to roll in.

In other news.

I’ve got another event to dissect for you in an upcoming post.

I’m finally taking credit cards with my phone. I’ll talk a little about the service I’m using

and finally I plan on starting a new painting soon. I would have done yesterday but took off for a play day instead.

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